


Feelings

by wisteriasong



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character Study, Denial of Feelings, Domestic Fluff, Drabble Collection, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-20
Updated: 2020-12-09
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:08:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23753623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wisteriasong/pseuds/wisteriasong
Summary: Romance is a fickle thing.And yet he finds himself drawn to the concept of it.
Relationships: Kurusu Akira/Reader, Persona 5 Protagonist/Reader
Comments: 9
Kudos: 118





	1. Thinking

**Author's Note:**

> This piece is pretty much an experimental one, since I've always wanted to explore writing a slow burn (never really found the time until now)
> 
> Hope it gives y'all a fuzzy feeling and giggle at the messy thoughts of our favorite phantom thief!

Romance is such a fickle and trivial thing, Akira tells himself.

Back in the days as a phantom thief, it wasn’t that there was no time for it. Sure he's had about several crushes, but he just found himself more preoccupied with bigger priorities, such as making sure he doesn’t stir up trouble with his reputation as the supposed juvenile, while hiding his identity as the icon of justice and rebellion against the system, trying to apparently stop a god from destroying their world.

Looking back, it seemed all so crazy and surreal, even if it indeed all happened.

Nowadays, his worries consist of simply maintaining good grades for a sound future.

Such a concept remains vague to Akira. To his parents, it was a stable job; others, it’s about having a family and a house of their own.

Akira sighs; his thoughts are all over the place. He should be productive right now, but instead he finds himself bound to the chains of staying in bed all because of a bad case of the common cold.

He thinks it’s outrageous that a man who’s fought Shadows and stolen hearts can be easily downed by a viral infection, but alas, he is still a regular human even with the ability of summoning his inner facade.

“Akira?”

To his surprise, he finds you entering with a tray of coffee, water and omurice. He can barely smell the food, but the omurice does look appetizing.

Again, his mind goes into that weird sort of reverie. He hopes it’s because of the low grade fever that his mind’s being all ridiculous, and not from the fact he’s all touched and fuzzy inside that you decided to bring him breakfast in bed.

“Good morning,” he greets you, his voice slightly rasp as he slightly struggles to get up; he blames the malaise taking over his body, a definite sign his body is fighting an infection.

“I knew something was up the moment I didn’t see you up first,” You click your tongue. “It’s actually really sad to see you still and all seemingly vulnerable.”

He chuckles softly in response, getting up from his supine position on his bed. “Do I look that bad?”

You take a seat on the edge of his bed, cupping your chin in thought. “It’s not that it’s really bad, but… very unusual, I suppose.” You state with a shrug. “I guess I’m just so used to the Akira that moves around and about.”

Come to think of it, he’s always been the busy bee type of person, at least nowadays. He took his parents and Sojiro’s advice to really prove his worth and up his credentials through joining a few organizations here and there. Even with the whole criminal record cleared and behind him, it was better to be safe than sorry.

People would likely still put him into question about the past. But to you, such things didn’t really matter. To you, he was the guy who fell asleep in the middle of writing a paper in the library, and the guy you tapped to save him from a possible scolding by the ever so stern librarian of the university library.

And since then, you two have become quite good friends, to the point he’s now your flatmate in your quaint apartment.

In a sense, he can probably consider you two inseparable.

He feels all nostalgic, until he feels a lump in his throat and the itch to let out a cough. He does so, immediately covering his mouth with the crook of his elbow to save you from the clutches of catching the illness.

The last thing he’d want is to get you both struggling to function as young adults and college students.

“Well you probably won’t be seeing him in the next few days,” He says with a slight smile.

You pout in response. “Does that mean no special curry?”

Akira flinches in response. The way you say it just seems to tug his heartstrings; it makes him want to get up and make it for you, considering his little promise from the other night has been remembered.

And just like that, you just seem to read through him. Almost immediately and hold onto his shoulders so he doesn't get up. Silence and what seems to be tension fills the air, as you two realize the proximity you have and have some sort of stare down. Though Akira's not sure if he can keep this all up; his mind feels like it’s about to fry, as his face flushes a little. His mind is back to its reverie of wandering off to silly thoughts again, things he shouldn’t be saying out loud to you, such as questioning if you’ve ever been this cute up close.

Luckily, Morgana comes in to save the day as he lets out a meow. You then let go of Akira to look at the feline gazing at the two of you. “Ah I’m so sorry, Morgana!”

As he clears his throat, you immediately decide to get up from the bed. “I’ll be back to get the tray later. I think Morgana hates me for almost forgetting about him.”

He lets out a soft chuckle, “He’ll forgive you if you give him his favorite.”

“Right, there’s some fatty tuna in the fridge! You’re a lifesaver!” You exclaim as if suddenly invigorated to face the world.

“Only returning the favor,” Akira says with a wink that makes you giggle in response.

Your departure from his quarters leaves him back to the company of his own thoughts as Morgana glances at him before following you into the kitchen.

Romance is a fickle and trivial thing.

And yet, Akira finds himself drawn to the concept of it.


	2. Past and Present

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He almost jumps off his comfy seat on the couch. He’s at a loss for words; he wants to say yes without a single thought, but suddenly his mouth seems to be dry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is probably the cheesiest and fluffiest thing I've written in a long time, so please do bear with me and the silliness of it all
> 
> That being said, yay fluffy tension!

Akira is no expert in relationships.

The closest he’s had to matters of romance are crushes, especially upon his temporary stay in Tokyo.

His first crush was around the end of junior high. _Yuki_ , he remembers. She was part of the drama club. Yuki was every junior highschool boy’s dream girl because she was talented, outgoing, versatile, pretty and had such a great smile. She was literally the class celebrity; everyone adored her.

And he did too from afar.

After the accusations and transfer, he found himself infatuated with Ann Takamaki, a foreign beauty most would say. During his first few days, she was one of the few that welcomed him less hostile, less cold. In a time where he felt like he had no one, she made him feel a little less hated along with Ryuji. They were, in one way or another, similar because of the fact they were considered different, and thus, were treated differently.

Over the course of getting to know her, such an attraction had faded.

Then eventually, Makoto joined the team.

Cute, intelligent, timid, and yet she was tough and stubborn. She became the team’s second-in-command, even in spite of the rough start they had when she had threatened to reveal their identities to the principal. Given their positions, it was unavoidable that they would spend a little too much time together now and again. Ryuji and Ann even thought they were a thing at some point.

And honestly, they could have been.

But fear of rejection was the enemy, the nervousness that boils in the throat when the person you’re attracted to speaks to you and looks at you with so much care…

For a man who was supposedly all suave in a mask, he was still Akira.

A former thief of hearts and a young man who is still grasping parts of himself even with his resolve to rebel against systems by very flawed individuals and change the world for the better.

The nostalgia puts a smile on the trickster’s face. To think a few years has passed since his life-changing probation and “rehabilitation.” He takes a sip of his coffee, eyes staring at the document projected onto his laptop monitor. He types in a few words, eyes glued to the screen until you pass by him to take a seat on the other end of the couch.

“Is the morning coffee boosting your mood?” You ask him.

He hums, mulling over his response. “Yeah, and it’s pretty good too,” he says with a grin.

Of course he notices the way you seem to just perk up from his response.

Even after having gotten better from his cold, he’s noticed how you’ve been a little more active when it came to doing the house chores. Prior to such, it was usually him making the coffee and oftentimes the one to do cooking; you were more concentrated on the cleanliness of the flat, as well as the laundry.

It was a little strange, but he spoke nothing of it when you seemed to be currently committed to your current house duties. Not to mention it was practically a blessing to see you light up at small compliments regarding your coffee brews and improving culinary skills.

Along with all those, Akira also figured that you would still probably protest that he still has the sniffles and him cooking would get you sick.

Which would be true and good points to raise.

For now, he may as well savor the small break from his house duties, and celebrate the fact he can smell and taste things again. 

Recovery, even from the common cold, is a slow and steady process.

With some progress made, Akira places his laptop on the coffee table and stretches, stifling a yawn in the process. He decides to relish the small victory of being productive on a Sunday morning, and eventually decides to take a glance to his right. He sees that you seem to be fixed on your phone, your right index finger swiping up to scroll through what he can assume to be either messages or journal articles that require your full attention.

Given such, he doesn’t expect you to return the gaze nor did he expect the sudden question that came from your lips.

“Say Akira, do you have a type?”

“What?” He blinks a few times, surprisingly not taken aback from the sudden question.

Then suddenly the slight anxiousness takes over and he finds himself unsure on how to respond due to the sudden flash of memories of you. From the time the first smile you flashed at him, to the content look on your face after a good day of class…

But of all the fragments of memories that lingered, it was the latest one of you holding him by the shoulders, suddenly stopping him from getting up when he was sick days ago.

“It’s called gaining intel,” You respond casually. “You know, to get an idea of what type of girl you’ll suddenly bring home, or hook you up with.”

He’s trying to read your face. Finding himself uncertain that the nature of it all is casual as it may seem. He realizes he’s right the moment he catches the light pink hues on your cheeks, and the fact you seem to be fiddling your phone.

Akira finds himself wanting to ask, to counter the question right back; within the stream of his consciousness Arsene tells him to, but he resists the urge. Instead, he decides to play it cool.

Or at least try.

“I guess… Cute girls?” He stammers, scratching the back of his head. “I mean, cute in a sweet and kind way. Looks, brains and everything else doesn’t have to matter as much as long as she knows what she wants and has a good heart.”

You hum in response, nodding slowly. Akira can’t tell what’s going in your head, and it gets his heart pounding, hands getting pretty clammy, until you finally open your mouth once after a while.

“...Am I cute?” You suddenly inquire.

He almost jumps off his comfy seat on the couch. He’s at a loss for words; he wants to say yes without a single thought, but suddenly his mouth seems to be dry. What exactly is the right response? Don't girls actually like it when they're called cute regardless of romantic feelings? Hopefully you won't take it the wrong way...?

Oh screw it, he’s faced greater demons than fessing up to a girl.

He shouldn’t be holding back.

At least, not anymore.

“You’re adorable,” He finally says.

And once again the silence takes over, he feels his head going on overdrive as you remain silent. Distress takes over his being and he thinks maybe getting hit by Mudoon or Mahamaon right now wouldn’t be such a bad thing, given the seconds you haven’t responded to his words.

You say with a sheepish grin, before getting up from your seat. “You’re sweet, Akira.”

There was still stillness at first. The fear of rejection looming stronger and stronger, as the phantom thief pondered if he should have kept his mouth shut, and stopped the impulse that stemmed from the rising feelings that was realized when he fell ill.

He ruminates, deeper and deeper—

All up until the feeling of something warm and soft press against his cheek.

It eventually takes seconds, moments for him to finally process that you had kissed him on the cheek.

He looks at you as you take your leave, somewhat rushing your walk back to your room as Akira finds himself stunned. One hand reaches for his cheek as he processes everything that had transpired.

Luckily Morgan’s meow affirms the reality of the situation, and the two of them simply just stare at one another.

_“About time something happened.”_


	3. The World is Spinning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You hate it. 
> 
> You hate how the oxytocin in your body is making you react so unnecessarily over a friend, your _best friend._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was supposed to update this six months ago, but I am a scatterbrain who got consumed by online classes.
> 
> Still, I hope you guys enjoy!
> 
> We'll be changing POVs for this one

You’ve been avoiding Akira.

Well it isn’t entirely intentional, but you found it hard to be in the same room with him for more than a few minutes. 

The beating of your heart would seem to ring in your ears; your mind recalling the instance your lips planted a kiss on his cheek before storming off to your room to avoid questions and a chance to see the look on Akira’s face.

You weren’t sure if you could handle it given you already asked him a rather suspicious question in regards to his taste in women, and most importantly if he finds you cute.

_ "You’re adorable." _

Recalling his words, you flop to your bed and grab the nearest pillow.

It’s been three days since the incident that is the source of your distress, yet you still find yourself being a hot mess over it.

You hate it. 

You hate how the oxytocin in your body is making you react so unnecessarily over a friend,  _ your best friend _ .

This is bad.

Really bad.

* * *

You decide that perhaps some fresh air would do you some good, and help ease your mind that has been on perpetual overdrive for the past days.

Passing by the campus library though, it seems to just trigger a trip down to memory on how it all started.

Admittedly, you’ve always been infatuated with Akira from the beginning. 

He was basically the cute studious boy you noticed in the library during the days you were in the library. You were either with a few friends or looking for a book on your own when you would see him on his own, eyes focused on whatever task he had at hand.

One day, your friendship started when you decided to take that leap of fate to save him from an earful scolding from the librarian.

_ “College students have to look out for each other, after all _ . _ ” _ You recall telling him with a sheepish grin.

From strangers, you two became acquaintances. 

And a week since your so-called heroic action, you two find out you’re actually classmates in a Communication Science elective.

Then from acquaintances, you became partners and friends.

It was as if the world just started bringing you two together since.

Sure it may have all started with a small crush, but you cherish your current bond with Akira more than anything. You help each other, and support the other. And if anything, it is something you want to keep for as long as you can. You're happy with your friendship, and grateful he gets to be a part of your life since you got to know and learn so much about him.

But of course, the human impulse is weird and complex that at times, you end up doing before actually processing the action.

Given everything, you ask yourself if there’s any way to act as if nothing’s happened. The answer obviously is no given your question, his words, and your actions at the moment. 

And immediately right after that thought, your mind goes into overdrive once again. You cover your face in frustration and groan aloud. Passerby and some staff along campus might think you’re acting strange, but you can care less given that your friendship might be on the line.

Things might never be normal again.

_ Oh god, what if he doesn’t like you? _

“Hey,” a tap on the shoulder stops the unending spiral of chaos in your brain, but also makes you jump a bit.

Turning around, you realize it's Akira right before you. In his bag, Morgana stares at you with a piercing blue gaze. Silence fills the air; both of you are staring at one another as an unreadable tension creeps in. You feel the need to break the silence in an attempt to break it.

You feel the need to talk about what happened.

As you try, Akira seems to try to do the same so you both end up stammering, stumbling over your words.

“O-oh,” You both utter, “Sorry!”

Eventually, it just seems like you’ve both initiated some sort of waiting game, afraid to cut the other off. You almost liken the nerves you’re feeling to taking an oral exam, or reciting in a class of a terror professor.

However, the waiting game of silence breaks the moment Morgana seems to meow you two back to your senses before leaping out of the bag and leaving you two to have a moment as if he could interpret what was going on.

Strangely enough, he did seem irritated a little more than usual.

And usually, he gets like that only because either of you would not give him his food right away.

Your gaze moves downwards as you speak, “Did… you need something?”

Akira shakes his head, “No… no. I was more concerned actually.” He gives you a sheepish grin, ruffling the back of his head. 

“Are you... okay?”

You want to say you’re fine, but you’re not. You're not even sure if you should even speak a word. Not when you recall all the impulsive things you’ve done around him. Gently pinning him down to make sure he doesn’t work while he's ill, asking him his type, kissing him on the check after receiving a compliment…

You clench your fists, and finally, you meet his gaze again.

“Can... can we go out on a date?”

Before you can even register the words you’ve spoken, you see color creep to his cheeks. He’s taken aback, and it takes a good ten seconds for you to actually process what you’ve just said.

You cover your mouth as you mentally shriek in embarrassment.

He asked you a simple yes or no, and for some reason you screwed it up.

You feel like you've just made things worse.

All you want to do now is faint on the spot, but the adrenaline coursing through you definitely says otherwise. 

For someone who’s often so careful of her actions, you find yourself so reckless and horrible when confronting your feelings.

At least, just romantic feelings though. But obviously that thought isn't helping stop the want to suddenly just fade away from the world and all of existence.

“W-wait!” You exclaim, flailing your arms. “Sorry that was so out of nowhere!!!”

_ Please forget what I said. _

An attempt to make up an excuse was trying to come out, but words don't register and you fumble over your words right before him. It makes you just want to shut your eyes, and hope that the moment you count from one to three, this is all a weird and crazy dream.

_ One. _

_ Two. _

_ Three— _

You feel your hands being held, and hesitantly you open your eyes. 

Akira moves closer, forehead pressing against yours as his lips curved into such a sweet smile. His eyes just seem to sparkle as he looks at you with so much joy and affection.

And just like that, relief washes over you despite the fact your cheeks are heating up due the proximity between you two.

He first apologizes for his shock. You caught him off-guard when he just wanted to know if you were alright, after all.

However, it's the last string of words that bring butterflies to your stomach.

“You know… I was supposed to ask you first.” He says with a light chuckle, "But I'd love to."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm hoping to have another chapter up before the end of the year
> 
> Pls leave comments to remind me to write (the support helps amidst the stress ahuhu) <3

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me at [@wisteriasong](https://twitter.com/wisteriasong) to talk about Akira and happy fluff things!


End file.
